Day 1

Well I am going to start up again.  I weighed myself this morning and I weighed 268.5.  I weigh myself everyday on the wii.  I didn't eat so well today.  I didn't eat breakfast pretty much like normal.  I'm not a breakfast person and neither is my youngest daughter.  If I didn't almost force her to eat something she wouldn't eat anything.  I had a Totino's pizza for lunch.  I'm not proud when I eat them but they taste so good.  I also had chips with is again. Not good. I don't know if it was just weakness or bad judgment.  I did a little better for dinner.  I had two hot dogs which really is about half of what I used to have and just a spoonful of mac and cheese.  I usually fill my plate, then clean it, then eat some of what the girls have left on their plates.  I don't want to pass down to my children eating everything on their dinner plates so I only make them eat until they are full and if there is food left over that is okay.  Maybe that will help them not have as many bad habits as I do.  Maybe just that will help them not be overweight as adults.  I have been a little depressed as of late.  I am having family issues.  And I'm not the type to cause problems or complain.  I tend to just go with the flow.  I'm an apologizer.  I wish I wasn't but it makes me seem weak and a lot of people take advantage of that.  Including people that shouldn't like family.  Like this weekend was Pumpkin's 8th birthday.  My inlaws came in for just the weekend.  They haven't seen the girls since around Christmas.  I had a party planned for Sunday but that wasn't good enough day for my family.  They wanted to take pumpkin to their house for presents early and when I said no to that they brought every one of her presents to my house on Saturday.  And they didn't stop there.  They also brought party hats, party horns, and a birthday cake with candle.  They pretty much cancelled out the party I was throwing her.  At her actual party that I threw she only got the two presents that we got her.  My family showed up but sat in pretty much silence the whole time acting like it was a huge inconvenience to them to even be there.  Also one day when we were talking about the new Ninja turtle movie.  I said that I honestly think the new turtles look weird and that they kind of look like frogs to me.  I think those movies are so classic that the characters shouldn't be changed that much.  But they went to see the movie which was fine.  They texted me and said that they really liked the movie and I texted back and said that I was glad that they liked their frog movie lol.  I thought it was a joke.  Then the very next text it was taken to a whole new level when they texted me back that I was going to miss out on a very good movie because of my prejudice.  Let me make it clear that I am not prejudiced against anyone or anything.  I don't like when people talk about me so I don't talk about people.  I don't treat one race different from another.  To me we are seriously all people who deserve to be treated equally.  All that matters to me is how someone acts and their personality.  I mean if you're nice to me I'll be nice to you.  However since right after Pumpkin was born there has been quite a few times that my family has called us either prejudice or racist and I seriously don't know where that comes from.  I honestly think I need to move out of Texas.  No offence to people who live here but I never should have moved to this state.  We just don't like it.  There is nothing about living in this state that appeals to us.  And we will be leaving it as soon as we can. Hopefully it will be the military route but if not then we will find another way out.  I am just getting more and more depressed the longer we stay here and it hasn't even been a year yet.  For exercise today I cleaned and I also spent an hour at the pool with the girls.  They had a blast and Pumpkin kept wanting to race.  Love bug was just happy to swim around with her life vest on.  That is one little girl who is absolutely not afraid of water or the pool.  I will try to be back on tomorrow. 

Starting the Journey again

Okay well I know that I said that I would post on here everyday starting yesterday, but I had a bad night the night before and so I didn't weigh myself and I didn't eat like I should.  I weighed myself this morning and it's sad but good.  I weighed 270.9.  So boo because it's so much but yay because technically I lost more than a pound since the last time I weighed myself.  I had a slim fast shake for breakfast and even though I wanted to I didn't cheat until lunch.  I was going to have another shake but I didn't I had cocktail weenies instead and a Greek yogurt container.  I promise that I am going to try my hardest to not overdo it at dinner which I am probably making homemade pizza.  I have been cleaning all day.  I never feel like I am doing a good job.  Unless I do everything perfectly I chastise myself for not being good enough and when I say everything I mean everything.  Even being a parent.  I try the best I can but I always feel like I am doing stuff the wrong way or I'm either being to hard or too lenient.  I get upset at myself for not being able to find the balance.  But every little aspect of my life I feel like this from my weight to the way I look period since I don't know how to do my make up or hair, to being a parent to cleaning just all of it.  There are times that I wonder why my wonderful husband is even with me.  Why he was with me in the first place is still a mystery to me.  I feel sometimes that he feels trapped even though he never treats me like that.  He is an amazing man who is very good to us.  He never verbally or physically abuses us.  Whenever he isn't at work he likes to spend time with us which is a lot more than I can say for a lot of men that I know.  I wish that shrinks weren't so expensive.  I could probably use one.  Well hopefully tomorrow will be a good day and I will lose weight.  Talk to you then.

The first in a while

Okay I know it has been close to a year.  But life kind of came and smacked us around lately so I had to take a sabbatical.  Things were going along great and not really realizing how good we had it.  Pumpkin turned 7 and then started the first grade.  We had her party all planned out even rented a room for it.  Then about a week before the party we found out that the hubby lost his job. Without warning or a severance package after working there for seven years.  It was like things were going great then all of the sudden our whole world came crashing down.  I immediately signed up for food stamps and medical because I wanted to make sure that we had food and if anything happened I could take them to the doctor.  However all of that took around a month to straighten out and we didn't have a paycheck coming in for rent let alone food.  I was scared.  We had to reevaluate our situation.  We decided that it was time for a change.  So we decided to move to Texas close to my family.  I had never lived in Texas before but they were here and it helped that my mom works at HOPE which is a big help.  So we sold one of our cars to have money for the move. Packed everything up.  Had to sell the couch and rented a uhaul and went to drive down here and of course that weekend first Pumpkin got sick and then Love Bug.  Then on the night before we were supposed to leave I got it and was up throwing up the entire night.  So the trip got postponed a day and we drove for over twelve hours to make it here.  I was exhausted from being sick and we left when it was dark and when we got here it was dark.  I was so tired of driving. When we got here and a little unpacked the worry started to sink in more.  Before we moved I had the move to look forward to and after when that was gone and neither one of us had a job so we were just stagnant.  It took a while for unemployment to kick back in and we were getting low on funds.  I only got half the money for food stamps here and only the kids got medical.  So still no job and half the benefits.  The hubby applied everywhere and I applied at a lot of places too.  I got offered a job selling vacuum cleaners however the pay and pretty much everything else was kind of fishy and I didn't want to get into something and regret it later.  As a last resort he applied at a temp agency and it turns out one of the only ways to get a job in this town is to go through a temp agency so that it's less messy if things don't work out.  So at least right before Christmas he finally got a job.  Even so Christmas was thinner than it had been in a lot of years.  Surprisingly pumpkin didn't complain.  We were expecting her to say that "this is it" when she looked under the tree.  But she didn't and it was a good holiday.  So after we got here we enrolled her in school.  We still had only one car and so I was looking forward to her riding the bus while the hubby took the car to work.  However we got here and in this town for some reason the buses don't like to run so there is no bus service for the students in town.  So instead we had to figure out a way to do both.  That way was to get the girls up at like two and then drive the hubby to work and then come home get them back to sleep to wake up a few hours later for school.  That sucked for all of us.  And the way they let the kids out here is very VERY unorganized.  Her old school was very organized. Everyone waited in line the teachers helped the students.  Everyone was done at the same time It was just organized and it felt safer.  We come here and then the first day I see it and when school gets out it is crazy.  There are people walking around everywhere.  Kids running around and random parents coming up to get kids.  Anyone could walk up and get any kid while their back is turned and the kids are supposed to get out at 3:35 but there are some teachers including Pumpkins that always get out like 10 minutes late.  And to get the kids you either park across the street and walk over or you pull in and wait in the two lanes in front of the school. However in the lanes if you get your kid you either have to wait for the line to move up or more often cut off the person beside you so they almost get in an accident and that is every day.  And that's with kids running around.  I'm surprised more kids don't get hit by cars and there aren't more accidents because a lot of the people here like to think about only themselves.  So things have been going on now.  During all of this time I have gained more than 35 pounds.  So I get to start over with my weight loss.  It sucks and I have tried to do the military diet quite a few times but for some reason or another it seems I give up on it on the first day.  So for now I'm going to try drinking a slim fast shake for breakfast and lunch and try not to overdo it on dinner.  I have to do something I feel horrible and fat and sluggish.  Love Bug just turned 3 and she had a Sophia the First birthday party.  We finally got another car so I don't have to worry about Pumpkin getting to school.  We are looking at a house to maybe buy because this one is outrageous.  The other house has about 500  square foot less which isn't bad to go from 2000 to 1500. Four bedrooms and two bathrooms and possibly a dishwasher that works and isn't here just to make fun of me.  And just last weekend we rescued a dog from an animal shelter.  He is 9 weeks old and he's a blue heeler mix.  He has black fur so we named him Loki. After watching Thor together I really liked the movie and so now the hubby picks on me saying that Thor is my man.  If the dog would have had blonder hair he would have been named Thor but since he is jet black he became Loki.  We are still in the not fun potty training stage and chew on EVERYTHING stage.  Even though he has plenty of stuff to chew on. So I think starting tomorrow I am going to write on here my weight and everything I have to eat for the day.  Maybe that will keep me on track with my weight loss.  I want to do something so that I can feel better.  Plus as a bonus my clothes will finally fit better.  I have some that don't fit me anymore.  So talk to you guys tomorrow.

Another week another start to the diet

It's Monday and unlike normal I was actually on my diet today.  I started a new week for my diet.  Okay now for the apologizing.  I kinda flaked on day three last week and I haven't been on here since.  I have been super busy and I know that isn't an excuse but still.  Also I guess I didn't really have the drive to get on here.  I really should have it probably would have kept me on my diet more, but hey you live and you learn.  After I did the last day of my diet I weighed myself the next morning and I weighed 237.9.  That put my diet at helping me lose 8.4 pounds and brought me back down to my ending weight form the last time I was on my diet, before I was horrible for almost two weeks. 

 

On Friday we had a really big day.  We ended up doing 4 things on our list.  We played balloon Ping-Pong.  That was fun.  We mostly just threw the balloons at each other but Love Bug went and tried to beat everyone up with balloons.   We had a dance party that had to end with the Despicable Me 2 Minions singing the banana song.  We always have to listen to that song whenever we can.  After that Pumpkin made dinner.  We chose a recipe out of one of the Hungry Girl Books.  It was a Hawaiian pizza thing.  It called for English muffins for the crust, marinara sauce instead of pizza sauce.  She used 98% fat free ham and I cut up some pineapple.  We used a reduced fat mozzarella cheese to top it with and I just omitted the red onion since we don't like them before they are cooked and I don't want to cut up an onion.  After they are cooked I love onions.  I love how sweet they are and as long as they are soft they are delicious.  However the cutting them up part I hate.  I don't like the tears or holding my breath and they make my house stink forever.  But we baked the pizzas and Pumpkin did almost everything and she was so proud of herself.  They were delicious.  I would honestly say that I would make that dinner again.  She did a really good job.  I was glad that she had fun.  I kept them up a little late that night and I let them have a fun bath with glow sticks.  It was really easy and they stayed in the bath for a lot of time.  I just made the room dark and threw a few glow sticks into the tub.  They slept really well that night after we did all of those things. 

 

Saturday was pretty quiet.  We didn't do much but clean up and I went grocery shopping in the morning.  We stopped at McDonald's on the way back home.  We have had to stop there more often right now.  Our McDonald's has minion toys right now and our walmart doesn't even have those so the only way for Love Bug to have a minion to carry around is to go to get her a happy meal.  We also got a Ba Ba poster for her.  I put it above her bed so since then she has had to say goodnight to the Ba ba's before going to bed at night. 

 

Yesterday my hubby and I actually had some date time.  We dropped the girls off at his parents house so they could go and swim.  While they were doing that my hubby and I were going to go up to Michael's up close to the city but since we had to be back by a certain time to go to a certain movie we ended up not going quite as far and ended up at a goodwill store.  He got a golf club and I got a book and a couple of really cool things for my kitchen.  They are like shadow boxes with small little sculptures of wine bottles and a wine glass and the other has bread and groceries and spices and more wine bottles.  I am so going to have to take a picture of them and post them on here.  I found them for $4.99 a piece and I love them.  I kind of really want a French style kitchen with French decorations.  When we got back into town we went to the movies and saw Grown Ups 2.  We saw Grown ups in the theater when it was out and bought it when it came out on DVD.  The second one was better.  We were laughing almost constantly.  He got his popcorn and I got my normal nachos which I so shouldn't have.  I knew better and I didn't quite finish all of them.  Still after we went and got the girls we went back home and had dinner.  I had the last couple of pizzas. Afterward I got sent out for Dairy Queen which is so not on my diet but it was delicious.  I always get Mint Oreo blizzard.  I am the only one in the house that likes mint.  Pumpkin hates it with a passion and anytime I have something minty she always says "Mint yuck" and wrinkles her nose. 

 

So having done all of that and eating horribly I weighed myself this morning and I had gained 4.4 pounds.  I felt horrible and I know better but I can't seem to keep on the diet on my days off.  But as long as I keep going down I should be okay.  So this morning I weighed 242.3 which is a huge difference from when I went to the doctor a couple of months ago with bronchitis and I was exactly 260.  So yay for the little victory.  I had breakfast this morning of one slice of toast and two tablespoons of crunchy peanut butter and instead of the orange or the yucky grapefruit (because the grocery store was out of them) I had pineapple pieces.  Not too many only like a third of a cup sliced.  I had a slice of toast and a can of tuna with a little bit of mustard and Mrs. Dash for lunch.  Dinner was a probably less than 3oz. piece of chicken breast tenderloin, one cup of steamed green beans, one small apple sliced, and one half of a banana.  I had the normal one cup of vanilla ice cream for dessert.  I got plenty of exercise today.  A friend invited us over to go swimming at her pool today so we went and spent a few hours out there.  Granted I wasn't swimming back and forth the whole time but I did get my heartbeat going a few times.  We are going to go back tomorrow.  I am excited.  The girls are too. 

 

Well I'm going to go for now.  It's bedtime for the girls so I am going to go and do that.  I'll be back on tomorrow I promise.  XOXO

 

Day 2 military diet

I started day two of my diet this morning by weighing myself.  Yesterday I lost 3.1 pounds yesterday which is like yay.  So that gave me motivation to go on with day 2.  We didn't go and workout (aka run around with the girls) this morning.  My hubby was really sore and he knew he was getting ready to have a bad day at work.  But back to my point.  I had one scrambled egg, one half of a banana, and one slice of toast for breakfast.  Lunch was one cup of cottage cheese, one hard boiled egg and 5 saltine crackers.  Dinner was 2 Jenny-O turkey hot dogs, one cup of broccoli, one half of a cup of carrots, and one half of a banana.  Then the standard half of a cup of ice cream.  All of that for 840 calories.  But this is going to be short today guys I am honestly really, really tired.  So I will be back on tomorrow bright eyed and bushy tailed.  Talk to you guys then. XOXO

Military Diet Day 1 Take 2

So yesterday starting the diet so didn't work.  I had a major headache.  It felt like it radiated up from my mouth to beside my eye up and giving me a huge migraine so when my hubby asked me to stop and get KFC for lunch it sounded really good so I got it.  After that I just gave up the diet and had cheeseburgers with the girls for dinner with macaroni and cheese.  So yesterday was a bust.  Eventually my migraine went away and I felt bad for the food choices that I made.  But the only thing I could do is say that tomorrow is another day to start over.  So I did start over today.  We woke up early this morning and went to go workout.  Pumpkin and I started racing each other back and forth across the field.  So I definitely got a workout in.  I was sweating like mad and breathing hard.  When we got back home I had one slice of toast, two tablespoons of peanut butter, and one very small cutie orange all with one glass of iced tea.  Lunch was one can of tuna and a slice of toast with another glass of tea.  Dinner I switched up the usual.  Instead of a turkey burger patty I had a chicken breast tenderloin that I seasoned with pepper and garlic.  I didn't think to weigh it but I am sure it was less than 3 ounces.  It was pretty good and I got to use my new cooker.  Anyway with the chicken I had one cup of green beans, one sliced apple and one half of a banana.  Finally dessert was one cup of ice cream. Breakfast was 286 calories, lunch was 160 calories, dinner was 222 calories, and dessert was 240 calories.  All that made for a day with 908 calories.  My fitness pal yelled at me like it always does when I come in under 1200 calories.  But the bigger point is that I stayed with it today.

I promised you yesterday that I would put a picture on here of my new ready, set, go, express cooker that I got at a yard sale for $2.00.  Here it is:

This shows the two inserts but they both come out and there is a circle flat plate that is bigger.  But the one on here that is the two halves I used this weekend to cook the omelets.  The were delicious and they cooked really well.  The only real problem is that the non-sticky stuff is wearing off.  Also I can make little bites of stuff.  I really want to make stuffed mushrooms in there.  It came with the cook book and I honestly want to make most everything in there. 

I also wanted to post a picture of the cookies we made last week.  These are the firecracker cookies.

We today just finished the last two cookies and by we I mean the girls.  I cross my heart that I didn't have one.  While they were good I was proud of myself for being strong and not over eating them.  So yay me!!! 

Yesterday of our List of stuff to do we made Frozen Bananas.  No pictures because it wasn't really a picture kind of activity.  I cut up the bananas early in the morning and threw them in the freezer so when they were done with their dinner they could have their dessert.  Pumpkin ate all of them, but Love Bug left a little bit in the bowl.  But to be fair she's smaller and I gave her just about the same amount as pumpkin.  Today we went to the library.  We apparently chose the absolute wrong time to go because there was nowhere to park near the building.  Our library has only like five parking spots in front of it.  When we went inside we saw that they were in the middle of some kind of program and there were people dressed as pirates.  But the bad part is that there was a hoard of people in there.  But we toughed it out and the girls played and they each got a couple of books.  I got a couple books on blogging so hopefully soon I will figure out what I should do to get some followers or maybe just a little help to make this blog better.  I also got a book on ribbon crafts and a few other things.  All in all I ended up with like 6 books before I made myself stop.  I really do have a love affair with books.  It's kind of sad really.  I would almost rather read than do anything else.  Which is good right now considering I don't want to get overheated.  The hotter it is outside then the hotter it is in my house.  Inside it's 83 right now at 8 pm inside the house.  It's just the way our house is.  It sucks but what am I going to do about it.  So reading right now is a good thing. 

I will be back on tomorrow to talk about the diet and how it is going.  Talk to you then. XOXO

Back to military diet day one

Well as I predicted before this week didn't go as well as I would have hoped.  I did gain weight, but I was hoping that if I did it would only be around five pounds.  Well here I am Monday morning and I gained 5.7 pounds.  So it is bitter sweet.  I mean I am no where near where I started and I kept it in my goal so yay, but boo that I gained.  This morning I weighed 243.7.  And if you remember when I ended my diet last time I weighed 237.9.  Don't get me wrong losing just over 20 pounds in a few months is pretty bad ass but we had a lot of family time this week since the hubby was off and when we have family time it is more difficult to eat well since we are usually out.  Although I have noticed myself trying my hardest to make the better choices for me and my girls.  Even on the fourth instead of the candy and other crap they could have had I brought star shaped marshmallows instead since they love those and could devour them.  Also it has been 4 days and there are still cookies left that we made on the third.  That never happens.  That being said I did have a box of dark chocolate raisinettes last  night.  I am not really a big chocolate fan but I really like it with raisins.  And the dark chocolate ones have extra antioxidants or something.  However the second helping at dinner I knew was a bad idea as soon as I got up to get it.  But I am starting back on the diet this morning since my hubby goes back to work today.  So I'll get a late lunch but at least I will be feeling better. And I do.  Whenever I am on the diet I feel better not only about myself but health wise.  Since I have been on the diet I'm good while I am on it but as soon as I come off if I eat anything greasy or not really all that good for me my stomach hurts and I usually spend a lot of time in the bathroom.  So it's more advantageous for me to eat better.  Which is a good thing.  This works better for me.  I have read how some people don't like it and either don't lose weight or they only lose like 1 or 2 pounds but for me this is better than anything else I have ever tried. And I've tried my fair share along with all the diet pills on the market. I just never really had any significant weight loss or enough to make me want to keep going.  I get discouraged really easily.  I always want something to work the first or second time and when it doesn't then I'm usually done and trying to move onto something else.  But this came around and I decided to give it a try.  I haven't really been exercising while on it which I should but I am still losing a decent amount of weight and it seems for the most part to be staying off.  Or at the very least not gaining it back as fast as I should .  On Friday I got to go yard saling with my hubby and we found one of those ready set go machines for $2.  It's a really cool little gadget.  I will post a picture of it on here later but it is really kind of cool it cooks stuff faster and healthier with no oil and I made for dinner omelets in it with tomatoes, salsa, and cheese and they turned out great.  Plus it really helps with the portion size.  The timer is broken on it but hey as long as it still heats up I know that I can still cook with it. 

Well I'm going to go and get my breakfast.  I'll be back on later talk to you guys then. XOXO